As a SAHM my main focus is Connor. But if I'm being honest, am I truly focusing on him they way I should be? One of the devotionals (January 5) hit me hard, making me realize that I often forget that "this is it" in regards to my time with Connor. The devotion on the 5th shares a scripture that really opens my eyes to how I'm spending my time with Connor.
Motherhood was a transition that I was unprepared for. I had these expectations that left me questioning my sanity and abilities more times than not. But as I've grown in my role as mom to CJ, I realize that I am exactly the Momma he needs and there is no better child for me to love, raise, and nourish. The verse shared above, along with the story of the day, made me realize how important it is for me to enjoy the moments I have right now with Connor. The good, the bad, the messy, the joy-filled, all of them. Because this is it. This is my one shot at motherhood.
Days spent in our pajamas, playing games, counting muffins and filling out our Valentine's Day cards for family and friends are going to be more common. Messes can stay, my OCD needs to take a vacation, my expectations of doing it all RIGHT NOW need a reality check. Instead of telling him to hold on so I can complete this or that task, I need to hold on to him more. I need to embrace every minute that I have at home with him. Because THIS IS IT. Because before I know it he isn't going to want to spend time with me like he does now. He won't be my constant shadow, a Momma's boy. He needs to be my focus, the main attraction, the "something" that gets all my time, my energy, my love. I need to enjoy life as it is right now. Knowing that God has gifted this precious time to me.