Thursday, June 20, 2013

Dear Stephanie...

Dear 20 year old Stephanie,

How your world has changed. You thought you had it all figured out and boy was you wrong. You sweet little sassy girl. Life is full of surprises and you will be shocked as to where life takes you.

The friends you had at 20? Thanks to moves, relationships and well, life, you aren't in touch with any of them expect Kristin and Carey. They are your "ride to you die" friends. At 30, they are still here. From time to time, thanks to this little gem called Facebook, you will reunite with a few others. Don't worry. In your mid-twenties you meet a wonderful girl who becomes you best friend. She is awesome. And her name so happens to be Kari Underwood. That will make more sense once American Idol rolls around.

The best friend from high school you lost? You are still bitter about it 10 years later. You will realize how hurt you were when you see her with him when you are out on your 25th birthday. That pain? Don't forget it. This betrayal teaches you a lesson you will never forget. 

You have a great work ethic. Most kids don't. They want to party and socialize. The only mistake you make it that you enjoy spending the money you work so hard to earn. That will bite you in the ass in a couple years. But thanks to support from a roommate and your boyfriend, you get your shit together. Till this day, you are obsessed with saving and paying bills on time. It's an okay obsession to have. It pays off when you buy your brand new car and can help others who need it.

That jackass you are dating? He is just that. A huge jackass and douche. You have no clue what is in store for you regarding your love life. It's messy for a while. You break a few hearts and yours is broken, too. And that's okay because you learn a lot from each of them and when you find the right guy? Girl, kiss your heart goodbye. He IS THE ONE. All the pain and heartache you've experienced is worth waiting for him. He is perfect. Actually, thanks to him, you can finally be you. Make sure you love him fully. Never give up. He is everything.

Speaking of, at 30, you are going to be married. Yup. With a baby. Double yup. All your life, you were going to be the single, independent gal, taking on the world. With the exception of single, you still are all those things. Don't worry, your life isn't over. It's actually better than you ever thought. Better than you could ever imagine. 

The baby mentioned above. He. is. your. world. He is the brightest light and the happiest of joys. As much as you know "kids will ruin everything", you couldn't be more wrong. Your son (of course it's a boy. You weren't made for mothering a girl. That never changes) teaches you some of the most important lessons. And just so you know, you are going to be a one and done type of family so don't get your size 4 thong in a bunch.

And that size 4 you complain about being too big, it's not. Girlfriend, at 30, you will be working your ass off (literally) to get to a 8. You need to love you. You are beautiful and perfect and happy and healthy. You have no reason to not like what you see in the mirror. At 30, things will be much different. A little rounder and softer, not to mention you will have some battle lines from having that baby. Every inch of you is still perfect. It's just different and that's okay. 

You will always be a Buckeye. You bleed scarlet and grey. But when you are 30, you will move. To Texas! WTF, right? No one will like it. NO ONE! But Sarah. Because Sarah likes change and believes in doing what you want. She never changes, except when she meets C. Then she is truly the best she can be. Moving to Texas is a huge adjustment but you will slowly warm up to it. Just believe James when he says he wants it to work, because he does and he gives 100% to make it home.

Your family is important to you at 20. That will never ever change. You will be just as close to your parents and brothers at 30 as you were at 20. CA will go to school in Illinois. Surprised? Don't be. He is just as awesome at 21 as he was at 10. He is still the best baby brother ever. You will be an aunt to 2 amazing little people thanks to Stevie. Thanks to parenthood, you and him grow closer. It's a wonderful relationship. Mom and Dad? They are still the best parents. After you lose that douche boyfriend, the 3 of you are much closer. And as much as this hurts to say, they were right about him and so much more. Don't worry. They remind you often.

At 20, you are searching for love. You find it. You learn so much about how it feels to love unconditionally. You are looking for friends to trust and believe in. You find them. You will learn to believe in yourself. It takes some time, but you get there. Once you do, you take the world by storm. And lastly, you aren't a hard ass. You learn this a little too late but once you realize it's okay to be "soft", as you put it, you will finally be comfortable in your own skin.

I'm proud of you, 20 year old Stephanie. You come a long way. You are one hell of a girl and you will LOVE the 30 year old you. Just wait and see.

The Wise One

(Don't forget to visit Mama Laughlin for a chance to win a blog intervention - not the A&E kind!)


  1. OMG....I can totally relate to losing a best friend.....and still feeling bitter and betrayed......and I am like standing up and applauding at "jackass and douche." Yep had one of those too.

    Love this!!

  2. I love love love this!!!! Even though we are new friends you could have written some (ok most) of this about me! Love growing up and looking back. Great post!!!


Thank you so much for commenting on today's post. I reply to comments via Disqus so if you are curious as to what I may have to say in response to your message, just visit this post and check your comment. -- xo, Stephanie